There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.   William Shakespeare

 I have said it before, and it is always worth repeating. How we see things and how we react is always our choice. Some of us choose to give away the choice to others, but that is, ultimately, our choice.

If you believe in some higher power, call it G-d, the universe, destiny or whatever, it may even be sacrilegious to believe that there is anything bad. Does G-d create anything bad? What motivation would he have for that?

I always liken G-d to a parent - it is the best analogy I have. As a parent, would I ever create something bad for my children? Would my parents, purposely create something bad for me? That is not to say that I don’t screw up every once in a while. But if my kids ever have bad experiences thanks to me, I certainly did not want that to happen and I apologize. Occasionally, I may punish my sons. While they may see it as bad, I certainly try to show them the wisdom of my course of action. Even if they don’t understand, as a parent I know that occasionally they need to learn a lesson the hard way. I don’t enjoy it, but I am doing what I believe is the best for them.

I don’t believe G-d creates any situation that is bad or that can hurt us. If we get into a bad situation, we either only see it as bad or we choose to be in that “bad” situation. How often are you in a situation where two people are experiencing the same exact circumstances? One is suffering, the other is thriving. Most of it is in how we choose to look at the situation.

And sometimes, we ourselves screw up and get into a sticky situation. We will get out the other end and be wiser for it. So while it may be unpleasant while we are in it, the situation is not ultimately bad.

Janet Foust on her blog Wealth Harvest wrote “First, I want to remind you that what we THINK ABOUT, WE BRING ABOUT!   And it is so important to surround yourself with positive people who support you and your business.” We so often get sucked into other people’s negativity. Even if we want to always look on the bright side, other will make sure to remind us exactly what is wrong with the world. I often call them “energy vampires”. They suck the energy out of you and out of the room.

So I have to make sure to

1. Always think positive.
2. Avoid negative people.
3. If I cannot avoid negative people, don’t let them get me down.

And I have found that the best way to do all this is to always try to brighten every room I enter. When some asks “How are you?” I always respond, “Perfect!” It is a breath of fresh air and it weakens the energy vampires.

In happiness and in gratitude

Shaya

Posted: September 29th, 2008 under Gratitude, Happiness, Law of Attraction.
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In parts one and two, we discussed why you should find your life purpose and how to go about finding yours (or figuring out that it found you). I hope that you spent the time to do the exercise and find your life purpose.

Now what?

Remind yourself many times each day

First of all, you have to remind yourself every day, many times each day, of your life purpose. Part of that is having a set time to review your life purpose and to meditate on your life purpose. I suggest first thing in the morning and last thing at night.

Every morning we start fresh and try to accomplish something new. Some days we feel like marathon runners, other days we feel like we are running on a hamster wheel. Like I said in the last part, the way to feel like your getting somewhere is to know where you want to go. So I suggest that every morning you spend a few minutes reviewing where you want to go.

At night while we are sleeping, our subconscious reviews and plans. Why not seed it with some wonderful ideas. Wouldn’t it be great to go to sleep thinking about your life purpose and then have a dream that gives you some great insight into fulfilling it? This won’t happen every night, but it will happen.

From Purpose to Vision to Goals

Plans are only good intentions unless they immediately degenerate into hard work. - Peter Drucker

Once you have your life purpose, the next step is to create a vision for your life of exactly how it will be. And by that I meant EXACTLY how it will be. What will you bank account balance be? Who will live under your roof? What will your house look like? how many floors? how many rooms? what color will the rooms be?

If you saw the movie The Secret, you may remember the part where John Assaraf tells how he had a picture of a 7000 square foot house on a vision board he had completely forgotten about. A few years later he is unpacking boxes in his new home and comes upon the picture and, lo and behold, it is a picture of the very house he is living in.

Having a clear vision of what you want is critical. Again, it is part of knowing exactly where you are going so that you can get there. Your purpose is your “big picture”, your vision is the details that fill in your big picture.

Once you have a purpose and a vision, you have to roll up your sleeves and get to work.

Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it. - Jack Canfield

Almost nothing will come to you all by itself, you have to reach out your hand and take it. Even all the lottery winners in the world took action - they bought a ticket!

I always love watching little kids after the Olympics. All of a sudden, every child wants to be a gold medal winner in swimming, track or gymnastics. And their parents don’t want to crush their hopes, of course, so they encourage them to practice. But we adults know that they need to practice every day from age 5 to age 20 to make it to the Olympics, Is it difficult? not really. But it does take a lot of discipline.

I have finished 3 marathons and I always will say that I can tell you how to finish a marathon in three words. Right. Left. Repeat. The secret is training 5 times a week for 45 minutes to 5 hours each time. That is the hard part. After 5 month of training, marathon day is a fairly simple and straightforward affair.

So again. Figure out your purpose in life. Create a vision of exactly how it will look. Get into action. Sounds simple - doesn’t it?

Posted: September 24th, 2008 under Goals, Happiness, Inspired, Life Purpose, Uncategorized, Vision.
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Follow your heart, but be quiet for a while first. Ask questions, then feel the answer. Learn to trust your heart. - Anonymous

In part 1 of this series, we talked about why it is important to find your life purpose. Your life purpose will help you to know WHY you do what you do. If you have a really good reason for getting out of bed every morning, you will never have trouble waking up.

So how do you go about finding your life purpose? Well, it could be said that your life purpose finds you, you may just not know it. How would you know if your life purpose found you? Look around at the results!

What are you really good at?

When I sat down to find my life purpose, I did a little inventory of my life. I had become a teacher without ever intending to become a teacher. My bachelor’s degree is in Agriculture and I expected to be a farmer. Someone (who I no longer remember) told me it would be a good idea to get a teaching certificate as well. It sounded like good advice and I was already a youth counselor and enjoyed that. So I also got a teaching degree.

25 years later I have never made a penny in agriculture, though I did have one heck of a lemon tree in one of my houses! And I love teaching. I love teaching in the classroom, I love teaching through articles and I love teaching through coaching. My life purpose found me - to teach others.

So what is it that you do that you really love - even if you do not get paid for it now? Do you love working with kids? Do you love cooking? Do you love helping others find spirituality? Do you love making art? Do you love looking at art or listening to art? Do you love leading others?

So the first part of finding your life purpose is to figure out what you love.

How can you help others?

The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning. - Mitch Albom

The second part of finding your life purpose is how it affects others - in a good way. This part was very easy for me, I cannot teach without teaching others. But let’s take an artist for example.

Imagine if Van Gogh or Da Vinci or any great artist was somehow independently wealthy and never needed to sell their paintings. Imagine if Van Gogh had never let the world see his painting of the Starry Night or if Da Vinci never shared the Mona Lisa. Would the world have continued? - Yes. But it would be that much less beautiful. The same could be said of Beethoven or Elton John or Paul Simon or Beyonce not sharing their music. Would we have all lived? - Yes. But the world would be a little less pleasant.

So how can you do what you really love and make the world a better place for others? Can you do make-up for homeless women? Can you help people on the verge of losing their homes with financial planning? Can you read to kids “from the other side if the tracks”? Can you paint a mural on side of a community center? Can you help a high school student council with an understanding of politics and fruitful discussion and debate?

Your life purpose should help others in some way or another. Similar to what I wrote in part one, even businesses that operate with a purpose of helping others are also successful at making a lot of money.

Put it all together

Now that you know what you will be doing and with whom you will be doing it, you are ready to write your very own statement of YOUR life purpose.

Start out with “My life purpose is to …” Now put in the verb that you figured out. Use “teach” or “paint” or “play an instrument” or “sing” or whatever it is that you do. Next, say how others will benefit from what you do.

Here some example of others’ life purpose statements that I found on the web. They may not have all the elements that I wrote about, but you can certainly get the point.

“My mission statement is to embrace and communicate good news.” Idelette McVicker

“I encourage and assist others in achieving independence, security and self-fulfillment for the betterment of our world.” Robert Knowlton

So now, get to work. 1. Find a quiet spot. If your home is like mine, you may only find a quiet spot at home at 4:30 in the morning. Perhaps go to the park. Or just sit in your car. But find a quiet spot. 2. Set a timer for 30 minutes. You will not move or do anything else for 30 minutes during this exercise. 3. Write your Life Purpose statement. 4. Read it every day a. in the morning when you wake up, b. at night as you go to sleep, c. at lunchtime and d. whenever you get upset.

Next, please post it here or send it to me at Shayakass@yahoo.com. I want to get some of your inspiration.

Part 3 will be about getting your butt into gear to fulfill your life purpose.

Posted: September 7th, 2008 under Uncategorized.
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 I believe that every human being is put here on earth with a specific purpose. Why do I believe this? Well, firstly, I have seen too many people who are very successful and very focused. What are they focused on? Whatever their life purpose is.

If they accomplished great things - they had a life purpose

Henry Ford was put on this earth to revolutionize manufacturing. Would it have happened without him? Most probably! But I do not believe that Henry Ford could have done anything else with his life.

George Washington, John Hancock, and Benjamin Franklin were put on this earth to revolutionize government and introduce democracy. If they had not done it, it is very possible it would have happened somewhere else. Maybe France would be the birthplace of the modern democracy. But these gentlemen could not do anything else with their lives. They were put on this earth to revolutionize government. Once they were given the opportunity, they could say, “Naa - I think I will just stay on my farm. Let someone else worry about the colonies and the king.” They were so driven to take action that they risked life and limb to create the modern democracy. Did they have to? Well they saw no other choice.

I could go on and on. Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, originators of the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” series have a life purpose of inspiring others through stories. Donald Trump’s life purpose is to help others have comfortable surroundings for living, working and vacations. Mother Theresa’s life purpose was to help the poor and inspire the rich to help others as well. Mahatma Gandhi’s life purpose was to inspire the world to consider race relations

All people who accomplish great things know what their life purpose is. They wake up every morning and they are focused on doing what it take to fulfill their life purpose.

Focus on others

I also want to point out that if you look back at all the example I gave, every one of these people has a life purpose that is focused on others! These people don’t only focus on themselves. Now that is not to say that they don’t reap great personal rewards as well. Donald Trump has a saved a few pennies for himself. Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen are both multi-millionaires. And that is one of the funny things about life purpose. When you fill your life purpose, it is for the greatest good of al involved, including YOU! Those who know their life purpose and fulfill it reap great personal rewards as well.

Very interestingly, this is also true in business. I read an article in the IVEY Business Journal out of London written by a fellow named Nikos Mourkogiannis. He wrote:

One part of the mix which is sometimes overlooked, and which can make it easier to put this knowledge into practice, is purpose. This word, in the sense that I am using it, means a reason for doing something that appeals to our sense of what is right and what is worthwhile. In a business context, it is what drives an individual or group beyond the drive to make as much money as possible. Leaders of the most successful companies over the long term first discover a purpose that fits the aspirations of their colleagues and the requirements of their business.

Even businesses need a purpose to be successful. He gives examples of Intel, Toyota, and Merck Pharmaceuticals, among others. The point is that every successful business has a purpose that is focused not on money but on helping others, usually the customer. It’s about making the world a better place. It is something that the employees can “rally around” and get excited about.

Keep your Eye on the Prize

I once heard a joke about an airline pilot who gets on the intercom system to talk to the passengers. He announces that he has some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that he is a little lost and is trying to find his way. The good news is that they are making traveling quite fast and making good time.

How many of us go through life doing fairly well, but not knowing where we are going? How many people spend a good portion of their life making a lot of money to support their family and at the end of the day, their kids don’t want to talk to them? How many people get to retirement full of resentment and a sense disappointment?

One way to avoid this is to work toward your goals every single day. But wait - what goal? You guessed it - your life purpose. What if every day you did five things to fulfill your life purpose? (By the way that is every day - not just Monday to Friday!) Do you think you would have regrets on your deathbed?

So for example, if John Stuart (a comedian) has a life purpose to help people laugh and not take themselves too seriously; he doesn’t need a stand up show every day. He could make a store clerk laugh and he has accomplished, to a small extent, his life mission!

Some businesses have figured this out. In business it is called a mission statement. Businesses that stay focused on their mission usually accomplish what they set out to do. Google, for example, knew exactly what their mission was when they organized all the information on the Internet. 

If you want to call yours a “life mission” rather than a “life purpose” I’m okay with that!

I hope you understand that if you want to “keep your eye on the prize,” you need a prize! You need a goal that you are going to aim for. And just knowing the goal will help you aim. Will you hit it every time? No. But without a goal you will never hit it!

Posted: September 2nd, 2008 under Goals, Life Purpose.
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A few days ago, I went for a bike ride with my son to the beach. On the way to the beach I got a flat tire. We stopped at a bike shop and we had a “cup of coffee” while the tire was getting repaired. We continued to the beach and spent some time there and when we got back to our bikes, lo and behold, the other tire was flat. My son rode and I walked back to the bike shop and on the way we discovered that he probably had a flat tire as well. Another two inner tubes and a couple of drinks later and we were on our way home.

People commented to me when I relayed the story “What bad luck!”

 I refuse to accept bad luck. If someone wants to find bad luck, they can keep it to themselves! My answer was, “No. It was good luck that I knew where to find a bike shop!”

Do you remember where the song Always Look on the Bright Side of Life comes from? From the movie The Life of Brian which is a parody on the life of Jesus. Now I know that some people were offended by the movie, and I do not mean to offend you. But here is one great lesson (perhaps even Jesus would have agreed with it.) Brian is hanging on the cross and is obviously going to die. And the guy next to him tells him to cheer up and starts singing “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life”.

One of the best lines, right at the beginning is

If life seems jolly rotten
There’s something you’ve forgotten
And that’s to laugh and smile and dance and sing.

Whenever we go through life and get down, it is simply because we have forgotten to luagh and smile. Also, we probably forgot to be grateful for all the things we have.

We can always find what is wrong with life, probably 95% of the people on the planet does that pretty naturally. If you want to be get over and above everyone else around you, you have to do things differently than most other people. And the first thing is to think positively, even if everyone else is moaning and groaning and complaining.

Henrik Edberg wrote a while back on the “Positivity Blog” a list of ten reasons to be more positive including that it will make you more attractive and you will waste less time.

It will also, probably lower your blood pressure and make you healthier overall.

So my challenge to you is everyday when you lay your head on the pillow, think of something that went wrong that day and then give it a positive spin. after a while, you will probably start doing it much sooner than laying your head down and then you might even do it in the moment.

And it might even rub off on the people around you…

Posted: June 19th, 2008 under Gratitude, Happiness.
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I remember over 25 years ago when I was learning for my Master’s degree in Education, I was learning about how to do corporate training. The very first step in any corporate training job was to assess where the client is right now and to find out where they wanted to go, what was the goal. Then we would create a training program to get them from point A to point B.

I am now reading and using Jack Canfield’s “The Success Principles” and one of the first things he has you do is create a vision for your life. What does your life look like? What do your finances look like? Your career? Your recreational time? Your body? Your relationships?

Some people say that this is all “New Age Mumbo-jumbo”. Well if I was learning it over 25 years ago, it ain’t so new. And if it was part of my Master’s degree at a respectable institution, I do not believe it is “mumbo-jumbo”.

The Law of Attraction, and Canfield’s Vision Exercise is the first step of the Law of Attraction, has been around since time immemorial. Perhaps we have a new name for it now, but it has always been the same. Know what you want, take action to get there!

 Pretty simple when you put it that way - Huh?!?

Posted: June 15th, 2008 under Law of Attraction, Vision.
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People very often mix up responsibility and fault. I have written about this before but I have been given some new insights that I wanted to share.

One of the best distinctions that I have ever heard is that fault looks backward, responsibility looks forward. When I try to find who is at fault for something, I am looking at history and hoping to be able to make someone “wrong”. The only purpose here would be making someone feel bad and perhaps punishing. The only influence I might have on the future is that one person might not be around. But I will always be around and my part in the whole affair will always be there. It is very doubtful that I will change if I try and find fault in others and it is doubtful that I will change if I just beat myself up about what I did.

One way to influence the future is to take responsibility. I love the phrase “It takes two to tango.” My brother went through a pretty ugly divorce a few years ago. Since he and his ex have a son, of course they will still be dealing with each other for the rest of their lives. My Aunt will often say how horrible my ex-sister-in-law is. My response is always that it takes two to tango. Is she acting in a mean-spirited manner? Yes. Is she doing anything to make my brother’s life any easier? No.

But my brother is equally not taking responsibility for creating a better atmosphere between them. If he chose to do everything in his power to create a better atmosphere, the relationship would change. Simply complaining that she is “Cruella DeVil” and a witch only cements the relationship the way that it is.

How many negative relationships do you have in your life? How many of those could you change if you took total responsibility to change the relationship? (Correct answer = all of them!) How much more inspired would your life be if you changed those relationships? Sure you could find fault with the other person. And that would make sure that things don’t change. Or you could take responsibility to change the relationship and create a change. It is all your choice!

(c)2008 Shaya Kass http://www.quotes2inspire.com , http://www.inspiredlifesecrets.com , http://www.planet4ex.com

Posted: February 6th, 2008 under Inspired, Love.
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“Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.” Peter T. Mcintyre

I had a conversation with a co-worker today. She is considering applying for a promotion to a position that someone is leaving. While she is confident in her skills to take care of all the “technical” aspects of the new position, she told me that she is not sure that she could manage the 20 people who report to the person in the new position. She said the she lacks “self-confidence”. Firstly, I was shocked. She seems so sure of herself, she seems to exude self-confidence. How can someone who seems to be so sure lack self-confidence?

I checked around the Internet and found an article by Janno Lassen on seven steps to increase self-confidence. Here’s what I like from his list:

1. Accept where you are in life, and don’t keep beating up yourself when you fail at something.

This is similar to the attitude Thomas Edison had that he did not see the 3000 light bulbs that did not work as failures. He said he now knows what does not work, and he can try something else. He had total confidence that he would figure it out. I guess that is a combination of believing that it is possible and being sure that you have the skills needed.

2. Don’t take yourself so seriously, we all make mistakes, and it’s not the end of the world every time.

How often were you sure that others thought less of you than they actually did? We are always looking at ourselves in a much harsher light than others look at us. Personally, I have resolved a long time ago that I would not talk to myself in a way that I would upset me if I heard a teacher talking to my son. I would never allow a teacher to tell my so that he screwed up. That he was not good. I would also never want anyone to talk to my wife that way, either. So why do I allow myself to talk to me that way?!?!

3. Remember and cherish your successes, no matter how small they are.

You have to keep the whole picture of you in mind. Sure you mess up occasionally. You also do great things. Why is it that we never forget our mistakes but are willing to belittle our accomplishments? BE PROUD!

4. Visualize yourself with success and high self-esteem.

Act as if you have tons of confidence. Make believe you can accomplish anything. If you don’t try and you do nothing, you will for sure not accomplish it. If you try, either you will do well or you will fail. Wayne Gretsky says, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

5. Finally, set goals for yourself.

If you have no goals, you will never reach them. As a matter of fact, you will probably never move or change at all. If you do move or change, it will be because someone else caused it, not you. Be the cause of your life! And the first thing to do to be the cause of your life is to set a goal and move toward it.

There you have it! A way to start at creating self-confidence and self-esteem. The simple way to say it is…”Love yourself!”

(c) 2008  Shaya Kass,  www.quotes2inspire.com

Posted: January 22nd, 2008 under Inspired.
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I was listening to a podcast from http://www.philosophybites.com about Plato’s idea of love. It is an interesting idea to think about. The podcast had an interview with Angie Hobbs, a professor of philosophy at University of Warwick near Conventry, England.

Dr. Hobbs told about a conception of humans and love, I think from Greek mythology. Humans began as rounder beings with 4 arms, 4 legs, 2 faces, the works. The Gods didn’t like that the humans were getting too full of themselves. Rather than destroy them, someone came up with the good idea of cutting them in half, then the Gods get twice as many offerings and sacrifices! Great idea!

The humans get cut in half. From then on, the humans are literally looking for their other half. Our search for “true love” is our search for our, literal, “other half.” This actually can easily be explained similarly in the Judeo-Christian tradition where Adam gives up a rib to create Eve. Perhaps our search for love is truly to “complete” ourselves. This actually might be the basis for the line in the movie Jerry McGuire “You complete me.”  According to this idea, there is that ONE special person and we search for them. One possible downside of this idea is that if we find that person and they die, there is no longer anyone out there for us. I am not sure if this is comforting or not.

The other possibility that Dr. Hobbs talks about is that perhaps we are looking for beauty. One level of looking for beauty is looking for the beauty in another person. Another level might be looking for beauty in art or thought. The problem might be that we fall in love with “beauty” not with a particular person. In this way, there may be more than one person out there that will satisfy our search.

Okay - philosophy is nice and all, but I am usually a more practical person. I am very happily married for more than 20 years. I could easily say that my wife “completes me.” But is my wife the ONLY possible person I could have fallen in love with 24 years ago? I am not sure. Certainly at this point I cannot imagine ever falling in love with another person. I could easily say that she is my soulmate. But did we create that or was it predestined by the stars before we were even born? I would have to go with the idea that we created our special relationship. Which means that it could have happened with someone else.

This is not at all a negative reflection on our relationship, though. It means I could have chosen anyone, I chose my wife and we created something truly special. I truly believe that whatever relationship you are in, you can choose to create something special, with anyone. Of course, both people have to want to create that very special relationship.

So to live an inspired life, create an inspired relationship!

Posted: January 17th, 2008 under Inspired, Love.
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This blog is inspired by the Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker blog written by Patricia Singleton over at http://patriciasingleton.blogspot.com/

How often do we allow others to make choices for us? I really want to go swimming, but I wonder what others would think of my body. I really want to write, but others would tell me to get a real job. I really want to take more courses, but my friends will give me a hard time for not spending time with them.

Now I will be the first to admit that there are some people with whom I am close enough that I do give them certain power over my choices. My wife comes to mind. And guess what - she rarely exercises that power! She will give me advice and then back me up no matter what I choose. Maybe that is the way to judge true love. But that is the topic for another day!

There are others to whom I give no power over my choices. At work I had to write a very harsh letter to someone who works with me. Not only did I know that she would be upset, I also knew that she would blab to others. I did not allow the opinion of others to dictate what I do and I worte that letter!

There is one VERY BIG caveat here. I need to be really sure that what I did was right. Notice I said really sure, not 100% sure. Really sure enough that I am willing to take a stand.

So when you are considering your options, do what you feel is right and act decisively. It is always easier to apologize if you must rather than be frozen in inaction.

Posted: January 15th, 2008 under Inspired.
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